I WANT TO SCREAM AND THROW LAWSON (my kindle lol) AT THE WALL WHILST I COLLAPSE IN A CRYING MESS ON THE FLOOR….I am such a drama queen but I am SERIOUS!!!! I don’t even know what to say…I am angry, frustrated, happy but sad…Why do I do this to myself??!! Actually I totally blame Rebecca Donovan…her amazing writing skills draw me in and puts me through the ringer EVERY TIME!!! For that I thank her believe it or not..she is AMAZING!!!
5 stars???? I don’t think so…more like 5 stars to the power of infinity!!
I’ve been breathing quite nicely since 80 days ago when I finished Reason to Breathe…counting the days for Barely Breathing…hoping Evan went back for that crucial moment and saved Emma. And the gorgeous R. Donovan gave it to us a day early..I psyched myself up, I was happy, I was anxious..I could go on! Then I forgot to breathe again and as Evan was telling Emma to breathe, he was reminding me too!
I don’t want to spoil ANYTHING because so many of you still have this on your tbr list!! Buy I feel like I’ve been to hell and back:
“Where have you been during those five years? In hell I breathed” – Emma.
Emma has survived “the night from hell”, her aunt is in prison and her uncle and two little cousins have gone. Emma is staying with Sara and her parents who have been given guardianship til she is 18. Emma then decides to go live with her mum Rachel, it’s her mum, she wants to get to know her. And so the journey begins of “let’s make Emma’s life hell again because it’s not as if she hasn’t had a hard enough life already”…bloody hell (sorry!) but give this girl a break!!!
Emma has nightmares..she doesn’t remember “the night of hell” but wakes up screaming…Rachel walks in: “What’s wrong with you? You’d think someone was killing you or something”…”But someone is killing me I whispered, every time I shut my eyes”…AAARGH Rachel I officially hate you and Emma I would have wrapped you up and snuggled you safe!!
Emma goes through so much again and starts to question the what if’s..”What if I didn’t exist…” would everyone be happy and safe – I was SOBBING!!! And Evan..the hero..”We could contemplate the meaning of your life all you want, but you’re my meaning, the reason behind just about everything I do- and I would never want to change that” – I love Evan even though he pissed me off once big time when it looked like Emma was standing up for herself..Emma got mad…I got proud…Evan got scared..Evan pissed me off!!! But then Evan..he got good again and I was reminded why I love this guy so much. He is always there, he is protective, he LOVES Emma, whatever Emma feels – he feels…
“Hold on to this life Emma he whispered, you are so much stronger than you think you are” – Evan.
And without giving anything away…HE GOT THERE ” I begged for you to breathe with every breath I gave you” – OMG I was in a puddle on the floor..actually I am still in a mess!!! Enough said!!!!
And Jonathan, yes I did start fancying you, even though you are one screwed up guy..but I would like to try fix you too (oh and go for a ride on the back of your bike!) LOL…
Jonathan and Emma – two people connected by the fact that they were both let down and hated by the people that were meant to love them the most..Jonathan helps Emma because he knows and this confuses everything including Emma…the destruction their relationship caused…”You asked why I stayed when I had every reason to leave – I stayed for you. I was drawn to you almost instantly without really understanding what was happening. I will always be here for you Emma”…But I can’t like him too much because he ended up being the catalyst for how Barely Breathing ended…
Emma sweet sweet Emma..I can’t agree with you even though I kind of understand why….
Evan you gorgeous boy…my heart is breaking for you….
Here are 3 songs that played in my head when reading:
1. Pearl Jam – Just Breathe
2. Theory of a Deadman – In the Middle
3. Coldplay – Fix You